Saturday, December 4, 2021

Wake Forest Obituaries

Here at the Wake Forest News we’ve noticed a trend about obituaries we thought needed to be addressed.

For some reason search traffic keeps landing on our website looking for obituary information on people who have exceeded their use by date.

For the record, nobody ever dies in our version of Wake Forest. We feel once you are a Wake Forest Nutter, always a Wake Forest Nutter.

We feel people in Wake Forest don’t die, they just go to faster free internet in the sky.

If you are actually looking for obituary information for someone who lived in the Wake Forest area, first off, we are very sorry for your loss, secondly, you might want to look over here or here for real information.

In lieu of the information you were searching for, the best we can do is make you smile.

Jim grabbed his suitcase off the luggage carousel and headed outside to hail a taxi. A taxi promptly picked him up and they were on there way. Twenty minutes into the ride Jim had a question for the taxi driver, “Excuse me sir” said Jim tapping the driver on the shoulder. “AHHHHHHH” screamed the taxi driver swerving the taxi across three lanes of traffic finally stopping the car on the opposite shoulder. “What the heck was that all about?” demanded Jim thoroughly shaken. “I’m sorry,” said the taxi driver, wiping his brow, “this is my first day on the job, I’ve been driving a hearse for the last fifty years!”


A dying man smells his favorite oatmeal raisin cookies cooking downstairs. It takes all the strength he has left but he gets up from the bed and crawls down the stairs. He sees the cookies cooling on the counter and staggers over to them. As he reaches for one, his wifes wrinkled hand reaches out, smacks his and she yells: “No, you can’t have those! They’re for the funeral!”


“Do you believe in life after death?” the boss asked one of his employees.”Yes, Sir,” the new employee replied. “Well, then, that makes everything just fine,” the boss went on. “After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmothers funeral, she stopped in to see you.”

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