The Wake Forest Christmas Parade was held Saturday in beautiful downtown Wake Forest, NC. It is quite possible that the police, volunteers, and parade participants outnumbered the spectators lining the route as falling rain certainly held back the massive crowds.
For those that braved the weather the rain eventually decided to stop and while moist and cloudy it actually turned out to be rather nice out.
A couple of marching bands decided to back out of the wet parade but the Heritage High School Huskies won the best marching band of the parade.
Not only were they awesome, but the only ones left. And thank goodness for that because a parade without a marching band is a bit like going on a date with your cousin. It’s disappointing and very weird.
Heritage High School put on the most amazing parade display. We asked them to smile and they uttered some strange Harry Potter spell and they flew off. Maybe they are just camera shy. We begged them to come back.
Upon their return they began some interesting river dance winter holiday gyrations using candy cane sticks and wooden weapons. We were now sure what this dance represents in Heritage but we are thinking it must have something to do with wishes for more school funding or high resale values.
And speaking of Heritage High School, this trombone player has one hell of a beard and mustache for a high school kid. Wow!
We are not sure what to make from this next float by the Wake Forest Purple Heart Foundation. It is either some abstract message or someone stole the people on the float. A bit surprised they had a flag laying on the ground but it just added to the unusualness of the honoring nobody presentation.
Not long ago we did an article and interviewed members of the Wake Forest Police Department. As part of that article we solicited questions from readers and some people wanted to know why the police were not doing more traffic enforcement. Well apparently the police are all over this now and even stopped one fast car in the parade, but only gave them a warning.
Speaking of fast cars, the parade had a number of WWII vets in Vettes. But the Corvettes also put on their best Christmas parade effort. There were quite a number of Christmas Corvettes in the parade but these two got our attention.
Major props to PNC Bank in Heritage that managed to bring out their Christmas train so soon after their recent bank robbery. While totally tasteless, we did feel compelled to ask them for all of their candy.
The Capital Motorsports float had a smattering of young riders on dirt bikes. But the most unusual presentation was the female rider they wanted you to lay away. We are hoping they were just talking about the motorcycle, otherwise this shit just got really weird.
The Hats of Our Heroes presentation stumped us a bit. We got the firefighter hat, police officer hat, military helmet, but the enthusiastic kid with the white hat was either trying to be a nurse or a gladiator. Not sure which.
It true avoiding liability fashion, the very cool car for State Farm insurance agent Ted Wilder actually refused to throw the candy to the kids and instead made them run to the car to get it.
The adoption float contingent was very cheerfully looking for a new child for this happy man in the camouflage gear with claw like hands. It will be a stealthy adoption during deer season.
Many floats put forth great presentations and you can’t go wrong with Girl Scouts and Boy Scots on floats. And speaking of interesting parade entries you’ve got these photos to enjoy.
In case you want to know why there needed to be an ACE Hardware pooper scooper.
At last the parade came to an end. And it ended with two images that fit right in the Wake Forest News theme.
First, while everyone else ended the parade route in the parking lot, Santa headed for Dollar General to beat the crowds.
And we met up with a couple of the bikers for Jesus guys and asked them to give us their best Christmas pose for you. They said, “This is it.” Apparently one of the guys, with the “body piercings saved my life” patch was concerned about you seeing his junk.
If this is an example of the style of writing we can see on this page, I will not be back. This is a story about Christmas. Why is it littered with profanity and sexual innuendos? I find it totally inappropriate.
All we found was “otherwise this shit just got really weird.” Doesn’t seem like littering to us. As far as the sexual innuendos go, count on more of those for sure.