Teen Caught With Junk in the Trunk and More – MNSFW

Warning: Maybe Not Suitable for Work

So this is not about Wake Forest but we come across the strangest things during the day. Many which you are thankfully not subjected to, like the Papa John’s pizza delivery driver guy caught on tape having sex with his roommates German Shepherd dog.

Damn, we just subjected you to it. We now dare you to erase that from your mind. We are still trying.

But that’s not what we wanted to share with you today. Actually it was the story out of Pennsylvania about Christopher Scheller, age 19. Seems the teenager was unlucky enough to lose control of his vehicle and hit a tree. – Source

Responding police were concerned by evidence found at the scene that Scheller might have been intoxicated. No word on exactly what that evidence was.

Scheller was transported to the local hospital for treatment from his auto accident. Police met him at the hospital.

And here is where the story goes south, literally.

Turns out the x-ray the hospital staff ordered turned up some kind of abnormality. The doctors were probably worried about a tumor but in fact what the teen had was a massive case of shed ass.

Yes the ass mass turned out to be stuff the teen didn’t want cops to find. An inventory of the shed included four bracelets, four necklaces, eleven ladies rings, and a bag of synthetic weed.

It seems Scheller might have been involved in a locally burglary and rather than get caught with the incriminating evidence he decided it would be far smarter to shove it up his ass as the officer approached. – Source

Now there is the definition of a real dumb ass.