I’m Boycotting “Have a Good One.”

Remember when people used to say, “Have a nice day?” I’ve noticed lately that people in our lovely Wake Forest and elsewhere, have shortened this to “have a good one.” Or at least that’s what I suppose they mean. I could be dead wrong. I’m good at that.

While I appreciate the gesture and best wishes for the moments to follow the handing over of my donut, I must admit I’m perplexed.

A good friend of mine asked me what a “good one” is. A most excellent point. I suppose the broad label allows us to assign whatever designation to “good one” that we want.

For me I’ve assigned bowel movement to “good one.” In advancing age you’ve both got to set your targets low and appreciate some much-needed regularity. It truly is a best wish for the day.

So now every time someone hands me a coffee, ice cream, or lunch-to-go I feel honored so many people care about my regularity. The best wish often results in me saying, “all ready accomplished” or “Dr. Oz was proud of me today” which leaves them with a puzzled look. Ha, the shoe is now on the other foot!

Soon “have a good one” will just wind up being shorted to just “have” or maybe we can assign a unique letter and number combination to it like G37.

But whatever you do, do not wish anyone an M9 or you will insult their mother to the point therapy may be needed.

For clarity we should assign all mother codes to begin with M and all good one codes begin with G. Proper company should stay entire away from all the F codes. Nothing good is going to come of it.

And for anyone that hates this post, may I humbly say, F7. But if you really want to get crafty, adding a trailing -A modifies F7 (F7-A) to add “and the horse you rode in on” as well.

Leave a Comment