Man Blows Load in Pants, Kills Girlfriend

Details are limited at this early hour but a deadly accident occurred yesterday in Phoenix that should be taken as a warning to all Wake Forest residents carrying handguns in their waistband and dating women six or more years older. News reports indicate an 18-year-old Phoenix man was hugging his 24-year-old girlfriend when she complained … Read more

Giant Pickle Spotted in Wake Forest Breaking Law

This afternoon we were lucky enough to capture an image of Phil Witz breaking the law in Wake Forest so we can provide definitive proof of the violation to the authorities. The image was captured from the railroad bridge above the intersection of E. Roosevelt Avenue and S. White Street as we were continuing our … Read more

Wake Forest Driver Achieves Unlikely in Accident

This afternoon a local Wake Forest driver managed to achieve a nearly impossible feat as the young lad, who shall remain nameless, completely overlooked a big ass U-Haul truck and smacked into it while driving up hill. The young driver only had one request for us after we arrived on the scene, “Please don’t put … Read more

Sex on Wake Forest Train Tracks Not Advised

As a public service, this publication is advising Wake Forest area residents to remember to not have sex on the train tracks running through town or the surrounding area. Normally we would not publish such a public service warning unless it involved either string cheese or tater tots but apparently not having sex on the … Read more

The Wake Forest Weekly Goes Big Time

five happy kids

Across our desk this morning came flashing this press release sent out on the nationally recognized service PRWeb. The Wake Forest Weekly was the prominent feature of the release and soundly praised for their annual community contest where residents and those engaged in rampant voter fraud, cast a vote for who or what they like … Read more

Upcoming Events in Wake Forest for Sept 26 – Oct 7

upcoming events

Quite frankly we have no idea how Bill Crabtree, the Town of Wake Forest public information officer ever sleeps. He seems like his duties far outweigh a reasonable amount of time. So from now on he will be known as Super Crabtree. Able to leap massive deadlines in a single bound. Stronger than an editor. … Read more

The Wake Forest Gift That Keeps on Giving – No, It’s Not VD

The Wake Forest Gift That Keeps On Giving – No, It’s Not Vd

Wake Forest is special in so many ways. Oh crap, that sounds like we are writing a puff piece. Let’s try again. Wake Forest residents are the luckiest people on the planet. Damn, we did it again. How about Wake Forest is unique in many ways. Let’s go with that. Yes, Wake Forest is special … Read more

Wake Forest Fire Department Engine 3. Pierce Saber Sexy.

Wake Forest Fire Department Engine 3. Pierce Saber Sexy.

The people who live in the Heritage area of Wake Forest, NC and the surrounding reaches have probably driven by the Wake Forest Fire Department Station 3 on Foresstville Road a number of times. So many times in fact they’ve probably filtered it out of their consciousness. “There’s a fire station on Forrestville Road?” Why … Read more

Wake Forest Police Issue BOLO for Cute Blonde

Wake Forest Police Issue Bolo For Cute Blonde

In an effort to engage in effective policing but also to be sensitive to the budding artistic community in Wake Forest, the progressive and very cool Wake Forest Police Department has released its first perp drawing by their new volunteer artist Mary Margret Muckenfuss. The “be on the look out” notice, BOLO in police lingo, … Read more

Asian Garden is Hiring. Anyone Need a Job?

Asian Garden Is Hiring. Anyone Need A Job?

Was just out and about and spotted a “Cashier Wanted” sign in the window of Asian Garden at 13654 Capital Blvd, Wake Forest. The sign says to call 347-774-5603. [googlemap src=”,+Wake+Forest&ie=UTF-8&hq=&hnear=0x89ac52535a64cda3:0x1d3af112e3888b20,13654+Capital+Blvd,+Wake+Forest,+NC+27587&gl=us&ei=_KYzUrK-EIrK9gTyroDYCg&ved=0CCsQ8gEwAA” width=”100%” align=”aligncenter” ]