Giant Pickle Spotted in Wake Forest Breaking Law

This afternoon we were lucky enough to capture an image of Phil Witz breaking the law in Wake Forest so we can provide definitive proof of the violation to the authorities. The image was captured from the railroad bridge above the intersection of E. Roosevelt Avenue and S. White Street as we were continuing our … Read more

Wake Forest Driver Achieves Unlikely in Accident

This afternoon a local Wake Forest driver managed to achieve a nearly impossible feat as the young lad, who shall remain nameless, completely overlooked a big ass U-Haul truck and smacked into it while driving up hill. The young driver only had one request for us after we arrived on the scene, “Please don’t put … Read more

Sex on Wake Forest Train Tracks Not Advised

As a public service, this publication is advising Wake Forest area residents to remember to not have sex on the train tracks running through town or the surrounding area. Normally we would not publish such a public service warning unless it involved either string cheese or tater tots but apparently not having sex on the … Read more

Paint Your Wake Forest House to Avoid Nuclear Death

Have you ever worried about surviving a nuclear attack in Wake Forest? Silly you, no need to worry. Apparently the easy answer has been known for decades but secretively kept from you by the paintinati. This 1954 Civil Defense film revealed the secrets to making sure your Wake Forest home survives a nuclear attack by … Read more

Wake Forest Obituaries

Wake Forest Obituaries

Here at the Wake Forest News we’ve noticed a trend about obituaries we thought needed to be addressed. For some reason search traffic keeps landing on our website looking for obituary information on people who have exceeded their use by date. For the record, nobody ever dies in our version of Wake Forest. We feel … Read more

The Wake Forest Weekly Goes Big Time

five happy kids

Across our desk this morning came flashing this press release sent out on the nationally recognized service PRWeb. The Wake Forest Weekly was the prominent feature of the release and soundly praised for their annual community contest where residents and those engaged in rampant voter fraud, cast a vote for who or what they like … Read more

Upcoming Events in Wake Forest for Sept 26 – Oct 7

upcoming events

Quite frankly we have no idea how Bill Crabtree, the Town of Wake Forest public information officer ever sleeps. He seems like his duties far outweigh a reasonable amount of time. So from now on he will be known as Super Crabtree. Able to leap massive deadlines in a single bound. Stronger than an editor. … Read more

The Wake Forest Gift That Keeps on Giving – No, It’s Not VD

The Wake Forest Gift That Keeps On Giving – No, It’s Not Vd

Wake Forest is special in so many ways. Oh crap, that sounds like we are writing a puff piece. Let’s try again. Wake Forest residents are the luckiest people on the planet. Damn, we did it again. How about Wake Forest is unique in many ways. Let’s go with that. Yes, Wake Forest is special … Read more